The Mud Show ™
        The Mud Guys

The Mud Show
 that damn Muddy Rag #1
Summer 1993   
The Officious Newsletter of the Sturdy Beggar™ Appreciation Society

I Want To Welcome one and all to the wonderful world of the Sturdy Beggar Appreciation Society. Isn't it fun?
Boy, kiddies, have I ever been busy. Being on Clinton's transition team has been a very real experience. I have been overwhelmed by how great my influence on our new president has been. Perhaps some of you may have noticed his second helping of mud pie at the MTV ball during the inauguration. (If there's any bit of business you'd like to have put into the President's ear, send it in and let me know). That has kept me very busy, so busy in fact that I have had to take a sabbatical this semester from the University of Michigan. Bio-ethics can live without me for a while. Thank goodness I have plenty of doctoral students to keep my master students busy on their theses. I have also been spending a lot of my free time in the studio with my band. Hopefully the CD will be out before our fall tour. By the way, Jerry's in great health and remember please, no vending, don't show up unless you have a ticket, and be cool. (Call the Dead hotline for details). My one regret this past year is that all these little projects have kept me out of the lab more than I would have liked. Even so, I'm not too far from perfecting my pollution-free, water-fueled combustible engine, although gold into straw is still a few years off.
Though life certainly has been quite hectic for me this "off-season," I do hope that this summer my weekends will open up and once again I'll be able to spend them with you, my dear fans. You are beautiful. If it weren't for you, and the enjoyment I receive from performing the Mud Show(tm) for you dear people, I'd be up on the space shuttle fixing that darn Hubble telescope. Hey, it's worth putting up with all those fuzzy pictures just to see all your shining faces.
See you in the future, and remember never eat mud! (unless you pass the hat first).
Billy Billy Von Billy

Out of the Mud Pit & into your home!

About a year ago, you took the precious time to fill out one of our cheesey little postcards, and we grovel at your feet in abject gratitude for that effort. You're SO cool! Sorry it's taken so long for us to respond, but hey, we're beggars, waddya want.
So here's our cheery li'l newsletter. More special Appreciation Society premiums are being bandied about. Our intent first, foremost and always, is to entertain. This SBAS thang is an experiment...we'll see where it goes. The Mud Show(tm) is the main thing. Come see us this summer or fall so we can entertain you right and proper in the rollicking 1993 version of the show the Boston Globe called "...Monty Python meets 'The Millers Tale' with a dash of 'Rosencrantz and Guildenstern." .....O.K!
Our furry forefathers (Ikey, Redbeard, Damien, Ceasar and Will'm) started Sturdy Beggin' back in 1980. Since then the Mud Show(tm) has evolved through several (sometimes controversial) incarnations, always striving to top the previous level of raucous good times. It's become a wholly unique entertainment experience, doncha think? We've been known as Sturdy and Bedlum(tm), but make no mistake, we are the originals. There are knock-off versions out there, imitators and scabs. ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES! (Let us know if you've seen a non-Sturdy Beggar Mud Show so we can send out a pack of lawyers to pick their bones clean) (yeh, roit) Let's keep mud-daubin' together, you and us. It's a beautiful thing. Sniff. Let's git to the Pit.

You Could Be A Winnah!
Remember, by joining the Sturdy Beggar Appreciation Society you are automatically entered in the "Dinner With The Beggars" contest. So don't be suprised if one fine evening two or three beggars unexpectedly show up on your threshold and eagerly ask, "Hey, what's for dinner?!?"

Didja Know?!?
Q: In Minnesota, "Land of 10,000 Lakes," what is the most common lake name?
A: Over 200 bodies of water in MN are called "Mud Lake." Wooncha know!!

The 1993 Sturdy Beggar™ Season
Coming to a Mud Pit near you...hope to see you there! (Specific rosters subject to change. Your mileage may vary)
The Bristol Renaissance Festival (IL) June 26 - Aug. 22 Billy Billy Von Billy (alias Old Beggar Joe), Spiney Nodules, Figgy Pudding
The Oz Park Medeival Festival (Chicago) July 31 - Aug. 1 Lutilla Fair Dinkum, Helmut von Mudt
Iowa Renaissance & Harvest Faire - Mason City - Sept. 4-6 Des Moines - Sept. 18-26 Lutilla Fair Dinkum, Helmut von Mudt
The Maryland Renaissance Festival Aug. 28 - Oct. 17 Billy Billy Von Billy (alias Old Beggar Joe), Wakka Ding Hoy, Gonzo DiMedici, Privy LaPew
King Richard's New England Faire (MA) Sept. 4 - Oct. 24 Legs Akimbo, Spiney Nodules, Hack Ptui
The Texas Renaissance Festival Oct. 2 - Nov. 14 Billy Billy Von Billy (etc.), Spiney Nodules, Sir Loin of Beef

Salute the Fallen Comrade
Simon LeSlime 1960 - 1993
Simon LeSlime 1960 - 1993Our good friend Slimn' Simon (aka One-Eyed Willie, Simon St. Albain) died on April 11. He'd worked with the Mud Show™ since 1982, principally in New England (also in Texas and Illinois). Simon was a great guy to hang out with and a superb beggar, especially in the streets, where he'd entertain patrons with trademark bits like "Rabid Lizard" and "Excite the Beggar." He was universally well-liked, an audience fave, and will be profoundly missed. A crazy, funny little guy... now wreaking havoc in the choir celestial. Salut, Simon.
Muddy Thumbs Up! Beggars' Faire Acts Hot Picks
(compiled by Hack Ptui, Old Beggar Joe and Wakka Ding Hoy)
After you've thrilled to a Mud Show™ or two, what other acts should you be sure to catch at the Faire? We Men of Mud have been working Renaissance Festivals for well over a decade now, and we've seen 'em come and go, boy howdy, so take our word for it; here are some of our top recommendations for quality guaranteed good times:
The Flaming Idiots - An easygoing and very funny juggling show. 3 talented and nice boyos. On T.V. a lot.
The Gypsy Dancers - Rowdy, sexy, fast and funny dance show, rife with audience participation. A beggar favorite forever. They'll be much missed at Bristol. Sigh. Still in New England...
Moonie the Magnificent - Hey! Didn't he used to be in the mud?!? Walks rope, balances furniture on his face, juggles, and doesn't have much to say. Goofy fun indeed.
Smee & Blogg, the Singing Executioners - Stalwarts of the Faire circuits. Classic look and solid show. Nice guys, you betcha.
The Swordsmen - Clever, sharp stuff. Great repartee, swordplay, and audience interplay. The show changes...catch more than one.
The Zuchinni Brothers - 2 of the most talented jugglers around and great guys to boot.

Rogues Roll Call
(edited and updated 03/02)
Here's a roughly chronological listing of just about every nutcase who's worked with the Sturdy and/or Bedlum Beggars™ through the years. How many ring a bell with you?
The Reverend Ikey Nokes
Damien the Red-Eyed Bastard
Rott Wyler (aka Sparky Maggot, Caesar, Caesario, Herbaccio)
Billy Billy von Billy (aka Old Beggar Joe, Will'm, Will'm the Poorer, the Regurgitated, the Rash, the Rush)
Grimy Fingers
Figgy Pudding (aka Sir Loin of Beef, Ham Hocks)
Bert the Beloved
Big Harry Lumpyn (aka Hack Ptui, Pike Spuzmonger, Tommo Bedlum, Pike Murdwynn)
Spiney Nodules (aka Will Kemp, Snug Frothingale)
Halfwit Henry (aka Wakka Ding Hoy, Sir Loin of Beef, Beggar X, )
Burnt Arse (aka Ned Crustdragon, Zorbulon the (fill-in-the-blank), Brother Bart)
Lutilla Fair Dinkum (aka Johnny Detox, Randy Passion)
Daphne, Queen of Everything (aka Crazy Katie)
Jacob Quick
Quince Boinky
Sponge the Wonder Beggar
Simon LeSlime (aka One Eyed Willie)
Pizzle McDick (aka Beggar X, Malcom Powder)
Nabboth Jakes
Legs Akimbo (aka Erm the Mad, Long Dick Montrose)
Gonzo DiMedici
Namrhok Nell
Moonie B. Slutt
Goose R. Bumps III
Fitzhugh Nicely
Privy LaPew (aka Beggar Bob, Jojo the Dogfaced Boy)
Iggy Slop
Helmut von Mudt
Molly Bloom
Moose the Magnificently Moronic
Woogie the Weasel
Andy of the North (aka Yourhey Blorchsky)
Dr Schmutzig Fubar
Bob the Beggar
Lucky 13
Apologies to those whose names we've forgotten. What is your name, anyway?

(compiled by Wakka Ding Hoy, w/Hack Ptui, 1993; edited by Lucky 13, 03/2002)
that damn Muddy Rag designed, edited & executed by Hack Ptui 6/93

The Mud Show
The Mud Show